Monday, July 11, 2011

Girl I'm in love with is playing me. How should I proceed?

Maybe she's just confused right now. She sounds like maybe she still has feelings for this man. But if she told you she loves you, maybe she loves you both and just doesn't know what to do. I don't think she's playing with you- at least not intentionally. She is probably just in a bad place right now- her father has been diagnosed with lung cancer. If this guy goes way back with her, she could just be trying to hold on to something from her past (when everything was okay) for like a security thing. This is pretty tricky though because it might just be that she really does love this navy- guy; maybe she was just needy after he left and thought you were really sweet or something. If the latter is the case then she probably really DID believe she was in love with you. The fact that she is hiding her interaction with him from you is probably a sign that she doesn't want to hurt you- in either case. Even if she doesn't really love you, I'm sure she has fond feelings for you as a close friend- someone very important in her life. If you truly love her, i understand that this could be crushing, but she probably really needs your support right now, even if it seems like she's pushing you away. Don't leave her side ever, but don't smother her, and DON'T talk about it- that could have really really bad effects. Just simply be there. Be involved in her daily life in kind little ways, like just sharing a joke or maybe going out to lunch somewhere laidback- nothing drastic like sending flowers(too risky). But if you NEED to bring it up, do it LIGHTLY, like tell her that you don't really know how she feels, but that's alright- you just want her to be happy. (you can use those exact words if you like) and leave it at that. This is going to be painfully slow for you, but don't lose heart,if she really loves you, it may take a while, but she'll come back. If not, well at least she'll still be there as a very close friend. Oh and don't call or text so much. It could come off as pressuring, and also just because real love- the kind that really lasts is something that takes time to grow.- it isn't Hollywood. If you guys are just WAYYY on fire, almost obsessive with each other, than it probably won't last long. Good luck, I wish the both of you the best, and I hope I could be of some help.

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